Je ne peux pas attendre d'aller

It's some ungodly hour on a Saturday night/Sunday morning and I'm sitting on the couch thinking.  When I was in my mid teens I set goals and very high expectations for myself.  Things that I would do in my 20's.  

Education and life experience were at the top of my list.

One of the last remaining must dos on my 20's list is to spend some time in Paris.  I've got an embarrassingly huge collection of things to do and see there.  And I don't mean the Eiffel Tower. I've been to Europe a number of times in my 20's, but it never felt like the right time to visit Paris.  I didn't feel ready.  But in the last few months something changed.  I felt ready.  Except I was neck deep in investments and properties and planning for the long term rather than planning for the next holiday.  What's a girl to do?  Nothing but shelve that bucket list item I guess.  But like always seems to be the case for me, when I want something, life seems to be able to rearrange itself to accomodate my desires.  One thing is for sure, it takes me FOREVER to figure out what I actually want, but once I'm sure, the universe seems to align itself to make it happen.  And the amazing people in my life help out too.

I'll picked up a little unexpected project that'll cover my airfare.  I'll sell some of my most loved items on eBay.  I won't shop for a few months.  300 euro all inclusive long weekend trips to quant European cities will appear on Expedia and I'll be able to go to Paris.  And Prague.

The only thing holding me back is guilt.  Guilt that I'm doing things for myself again.  Going to places I want to go, crossing things off my teenage list.  Why should I always be able to do what I want?